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Ranking (and Roasting) the 2017 Mariners Walk-Up Music

First things first, the Mariners have been using “Spoonman” by Soundgarden as part of their pregame 40 year anniversary highlights pump-up package, which is a great choice. So a big ol’ RIP to the legendary Chris Cornell. Please solemnly head bang to this jam first before proceeding.

All right, moving on. Here is a comprehensive list of all the various walk-up and intro music the Mariners are using in 2017. We all know baseball players are not typically creatures of refined taste in pop culture. They like what they’re familiar with. In some cases, walk-up music is chosen as a point of pride for a player’s cultural or ethnic background. Other times, it’s just some dumb song they’re just kinda okay with, or I dunno, the DJ suggested it. If you go to lots of games as a fan, you begin to become familiar with the songs and know who’s up even if you missed hearing the player’s name. Sometimes, years later, you’ll still think of a particular player whenever you hear their walk-up song.

So let’s get to some rankings. For the sake of brevity, I’m limiting this to the top 5 walk-up jams of the batters, a separate section for pitchers, and then the duds of the bunch.

TOP FIVE

Taylor Motter – “The Mack” by Nevada featuring Mark Morrison and Fetty Wap

Although I wish he’d just gone with the original, which is still one of those songs that will get me up and dancing in just about any social situation, I do fully approve of this walk up jam. Fetty Wap does his Fetty Wap thing intermittently and the video shows fun scenes from New Orleans, which is one of my favorite cities.

Mitch Haniger – “HUMBLE.” by Kendrick Lamar

Of course our boy Mitch walks out to most fire track on this whole damn list. The beat bumps, Kendrick sorts out many a hater, and the video is full of striking visuals. Come back soon, Hani-mal.

Ben Gamel – “Country State of Mind” by Hank Williams, Jr.

Okay, I gotta give it up to Ben here for at least choosing something that comes close to good country. Hank Jr. is….hit and miss, to say the least, and this is closer to a miss, but at least it’s not some bullshit pop radio country song. See below for further rants and missives on all that.

Carlos Ruiz – “In the Air Tonight” by Phil Collins

This is a great pick because it’s old and tired as hell, just like Chooch. But, every ballpark benefits from a great 80’s pop hit wafting through the stands every few innings, so yeah, this is prime walk-up music. Obviously they just use the part after the sick drum fill, which is the part everyone loves. Chooch just wants to give the people want they want and if he can’t do it behind the plate or at the plate, he’ll do it with his walk-up music, god dammit.

Guillermo Heredia – “Coronamos” by El Taiger featuring Cosculluela, J Balvin, and Bad Bunny

I don’t know much Spanish, but this shit is great. Coronamos means “to crown” per Google, so that explains…

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